30
	-------------------------------------

	Where do we go from here?, 30 asks.
	29 chances to get it right
	wasted & blamed
	on mothers & lovers
	& a desert of liars.
	30 wants what she was promised
	when she was 20 and the world 
	was at her fearless feet.
	30 doesn't want to 
	break anyone's heart
	but she's not waiting
	for a kiss, and she's not allowing
	distance to control her anymore.

	30 says these things with fire.
	But with her eyes closed
	30 fears a life forsaken
	not feeling grateful enough
	tolerant enough
	brave enough
	for the one still to come.
	30 is thick and bland
	under overcast skies
	unable to distinguish
	what was
	from what will be.


october 16, 2003