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June 2, 2008

lsgl: rendering

by sven at 11:11 am

bowdlerized from xkcd

Day 38 in the 100-day countdown

I've finished rendering about 45 seconds of Let Sleeping Gods Lie's Act 2, which should be about 2 min long. Barring big problems, I should be able to get Act 2 done this month. Which means I can start worrying about whether or not I can finish Act 3 (already 80% complete) and get the sound done in time for the August 15 deadline. Things are hopeful: it looks like I have a decent chance of finishing this project! :D

But it's taking a toll. There are days when this film feels like a death march. It's not that I mind hard work -- hard work is satisfying when it gives a sense of control. The problem is that I don't feel like I'm in control of the film right now -- rather, it controls me.

For the first 50ish days of the 100-day countdown, I set myself a 25 hour per week goal -- and when I hit it, I could quit working on the film and do other projects. Now, it feels like I can't afford to ever stop; I simply have to put in as many hours as humanly possible. It makes me feel trapped.

Another facet of losing control is that right now I have these massive renders to output. I'll spend 2-10 hours preparing a file, and then it renders overnight, for 24 hours or more. That means I get a break... But when it's going to happen is unpredictable. So I can't anticipate it or relax when it happens. It feels like being on-call; a rhythm of life that I've seen folks in the medical profession go through, which has always seemed eviscerating.

This is just a hard part. It'll be fine... Despite what it feels like, this project will NOT last forever.

posted by sven | June 2, 2008 11:11 AM | categories: let sleeping gods lie